This was mainly to get rid of the other post. Though all in all, I am not feeling much better or more assured than I was that night. I don't know, every night I sit here alone, and I used to have Lauren to talk to early in the night, at least earlier than two in the morning, now I don't even have that. I don't know where my life is going at the moment but I am just hanging on for the ride. I'm not upset, not angry, just a little lonely, because it really is nobodies fault. I really hope you do read this and you realize how much I need you, though you never do seem to read my journals. I do love you so very much. This was a bit longer before, so there has been an edit to it, but after I called you and you were so sleepily adorable on the phone, and you apologized for falling asleep, I realized how I can't be upset, your voice makes everything better.

On a more whimsical note, Been watching Justice League and have some weird issues with certain things. This show makes me ponder things too much, though I find the pairing of Wonder Woman and Batman to be amazing and ridiculous at the same time. I do enjoy that those two make me question things the most too. Two of my favorite parts of the whole series have a focus with batman, the Justice Lords, and how their batman helps the League get back to their world, and A savage time, where time changes and the only one that is different is batman out of the league. This one made me smile because it not only had Dick Grayson and Barbara Gordon making out, it also had Tim Drake and Cassandra Cain playing together. Also Bearded superman in a future with a red sun making a sword and fighting mutant wolves if f-ing amazing.

Also, I got back into the Air Gear manga and I read all the way through the series in a matter of around 3 days. Since it is ongoing, I am really excited to see what is going to happen next. I really like the characters in the series, and the whole idea of Air Trek is amazing. I think that it is going to get me to start roller blading again when it gets warmer... and when my ankle gets better, which will happen sooner than the weather. that reminds me, I also sprained my ankle. Yeah, fought a bear after math class and it pushed me down some stairs. actually I just fell down the stairs, and yeah. oh well, that stuff happens. I hope whoever reads this has a better time than I am at the moment.

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So, I know a whole not of nobody is going to read this, cause most of my journals are the same thing over and over again, and if anyone happens to read this I am sorry. I know i have said this before, but I am trying to be less depressed and stuff, it is just hard with a fiancee in a different state.
yes, i did say fiancee. I asked Lauren to marry me. It makes me nervous, because all through my life i have had difficulty with the idea of marriage, and the whole being engaged long distance thing just never seemed to work out. that is why I waited so long, that and I wanted to make it perfect. unfortunately the second did not happen. I did not even have a ring. I told her though that since i did not have a ring and I did not get to propose to her that way I wanted, I will surprise her with the ring in the way I want. I am scared, but at the same time, I am so excited about it. I have confidence that everything will work out.
I also fell into the clutches of Collectible Card Games. I started playing Magic the Gathering. I am trying not to let it consume me because it fun, and I have an addictive personality. It is fun though, and I never played it till now. I had some friends get me into it, and now I have a blast playing it.
Also, Advance Wars: Day of Ruin! I hope to get this soon. I am excited for it. I love Advance Wars games, and I wanted something new to play instead of playing Pokemon again.
Finally, Lucario in Super Smash Bros? Anyone else as excited as I am?


PS I love you Lauren.

The past few weeks were magnificent and then they just went crashing down to the ground while i went up in the air in my plane. I just left Arkansas and I know most people don't care, but it just hurts inside. the one thing that keeps me going is knowing that the next time that i see Lauren, there will be no goodbyes when we move in together.

Happy Holidays, merry Christmas and all that jazz. I hope you all have a good holiday, if anyone reads this. Only a couple more days until I go down to see my one and only Lauren. Wish me luck on getting to my 6:30 am flight on Christmas morning.

PS- if anyone can help me make a sprite for my trainer card, just let me know and let me know what you want in return. or if you can help me get it to show up on this page as well.

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